What are the flippin’ tipping rules?

 On Friday evening, I found myself in a rather conflicting situation. I had met two girlfriends for a pizza before we were set to hear one of said friends read her new creative writing piece in an east London vintage (obvs) café.

The setting was a large, vibrant and, dare I say, hip warehouse pizzeria on Shoreditch high street. The atmosphere was suffocated with overly enthusiastic smiling waiters and chefs with the similar sort of grating energy you find amongst staff in Abercrombie and Fitch. I felt immediately, albeit reluctantly, suspicious. My meal was to be pizza, withOUT artichokes, as I specifically told our sweet Italian waiter and I asked whether I might swap the artichokes for something else, like olives. (Now, before you scorn me for being too fussy and say that I should just choose a pizza with only toppings that I like, I take your point. But, I never forget what a wise waiter in an American restaurant once told my parents, forever embarrassed by my alteration requests: “By telling us what you want, you are helping us to do a better job for you.” So there.) “Yes, of course”, he replied. “Will there be an extra charge?” I checked. “Yes, somewhere between £1- £3,” he smiled back. Forgive me for seeming stingy, but that seems a tad extortionate just to swap a pair of cheap pizza toppings. Forever on an intern’s wage (i.e. nothing), I had told myself I would spend no more than £10, but of course the cheapest pizza was £11, so I was already over budget. I couldn’t stop myself from remarking, “Oh, that seems a bit silly. Can’t I just swap them for free?” I don’t quite understand why these things have to be so difficult. “I can’t, it’s impossible; the till will add the extra automatically if I change the order,” he winced back. Impossible? Is that really what the world is coming to?

Now this really ticks me off. These corporate-driven, large, chain restaurants are so determined to squeeze every penny out of their customers, and have systems so rigid and efficient, that it becomes ‘impossible’ to change something as simple as artichokes for olives. In growing to the size they do, they lose all room for personal service and reasonable flexibility, and the result is baffled, miffed customers like me.

Upon seeing my dissatisfaction, the waiter said he would see if the chef might swap them for free. I felt mildly gratified with the small impact I might have had on the world of impersonal, inflexible, money-grabbing corporate restaurants.

A few glasses of hilariously flashy and enthusiastically waiter-poured water later, our three pizzas arrived. I looked down in bemusement to see both olives and artichokes on my pizza. Despite how much I.don’t.like.artichokes… bugger it, I thought, as I started to unearth all the hidden pieces of the slimy stuff. Luckily, my friend was keen to eat them instead. When our cheery waiter bounded over to ask if everything was okay, I couldn’t help but point out that my pizza had in fact come with artichokes. “Oh no!” he cried, “I forgot to say to take off the artichokes, sorry.” He was sweet, but at no point did he offer to change the pizza or make up for his error, as I might have done in his position.

When the bill arrived, my pizza was (thank goodness) priced at the original £11. I was less thrilled, however, to see the12.5% ‘service charge’ added to the bottom of the bill. Now I know that tipping is a grey area here in Britain, but I feel it’s about time we cleared that up. Here I faced a dilemma: my order was wrong, but the bill was demanding that I tip.

In America, service charge is not included on bills but everyone knows that it is extremely rude not to tip because servers depend upon this to make up a reasonable wage. The result can be falsely-friendly servers in constant search of a larger tip. In France, service charge is integrated into the original price of all food and drinks, tipping is not required and when people choose to tip, it is usually a modest amount. The result can be utterly miserable servers who couldn’t care less if you ate in their restaurant or not. Now, I’m not arguing that one is better than the other, but asking what are the rules in the UK?

For me, tipping should be something you do if you are particularly impressed with your service. Social pressure, however, means I generally try to tip 10% if I am at least content with the service. All restaurant owners are by law required to pay their staff at least the minimum wage and that is why the need and culture for tipping is less than in the US. In this way, some argue, tipping actually encourages the perpetuation of low wages. If the basic salary is not enough, then we need to raise the minimum wage. Tipping could then be what it is actually meant to be: a show of appreciation for really good service. The whole idea of tipping is surely that it comes from the customer, not something demanded of customers by businesses. Surely that way the establishment has more motivation to provide a great service and can measure customer satisfaction by the tips received.

In Friday night’s situation, I felt I could not tip. Firstly, because I could not really afford to, but more importantly, because my order had been wrong.

As we were getting up to leave, a manager-type in a suit swooped over to ask if there had been a problem with the service. Not only were they demanding that we pay a tip but they were now making us feel extremely awkward for not doing so. I explained that our waiter had been lovely, but that my order was wrong, and so I did not feel that giving a tip was appropriate. I added that including service charge on the bill arguably puts customers in difficult situations such as the present one. “It’s discretionary, it’s discretionary,” he replied defensively. Well, it may be discretionary, but my order was wrong.   What would they have expected if it had been correct? 30%?! The establishment adding a tip themselves feels unfair and pointless.  

I sometimes wonder whether my feelings towards tipping would be different if I was not on such a tight budget: if I had more money I would surely be willing to be more generous in these situations. I probably would, but actually the principle remains the same. A tip should come from the customer and not from the establishment. If establishments want to pay their service staff higher wages (and in nearly all cases they should), then they should increase their basic prices or cut wages at the top. We should not have this confusing situation where some restaurants add it and others do not, where no-one really knows whether a tip is expected or not, and where you are required to tip even if your order is wrong.  It makes things very difficult for people on little money who were not expecting to pay extra, and it makes redundant the idea that a tip is a show of appreciation for particularly good service. Let’s get rid of ‘discretionary’ and establish our tipping culture once and for all!